Forget about evacuating the dancefloor. If you're plagued by unwanted guests this yuletide, simply spin Cascada's Christmas album and watch the fuckers flee like Usain Bolt. I'm struggling to believe that this actually exists. A couple of months ago I came up with a list of the campest holiday albums of all time for Idolator - my fave was the KFC Xmas soundtrack - but I think It's Christmas Time might just take the cake.
I love Natalie as much as the next fag but who really needs a Hi-NRG cover of "Silent Night" in their life? And what has she done to "Away In A Manger"? I'm scared to listen! If the German diva's devastating destruction of Wham's "Last Christmas" (below) is any indication, It's Christmas Time could be absolutely unbearable. On the bright side, I now know what to buy for the human pollution in my life.