I remember when a new Madonna video was an international event. These days the poor bitch has to settle for a couple of middle-aged gays losing their shit on Twitter. Life is cruel. "Turn Up The Radio" is the third visual from her aluminum-selling MDNA album and, happily, marks something of a return to form. Don't get me wrong. This is no masterpiece and it pales in comparison to the latest efforts from relevant pop stars like Katy Perry but it's harmless fun and Madonna looks less terrifying than usual in the daylight. Here are 5 random thoughts about "Turn Up The Radio":
1. The song is truly awful. I hated Hard Candy but at least it had two good cuts.
2. Madonna does not understand irony. This song will never be played on the radio and the diva's fans are too old to follow her along the winding streets of Italy without zimmer frames and assistance animals.
3. Why have the videos from MDNA been so cheap? The former hitmaker is one of the richest women alive. She can afford to drop a couple of million on a memorable clip instead of working with the kind of budget Dannii is usually lumped with.
4. The concept reminds me a bit of Kreayshawn's "Gucci Gucci" video - only with an exotic locale and attractive people.
5. Madonna looks nice and she appears to be having a good time. I just don't know why she bothered. The clip isn't spectacular enough to help the single and the song isn't good enough to boost the album. She'd be better off rush-recording a couple of new tracks and re-releasing MDNA. Pop stars who still care about their career do it all the time.
I guess we should be grateful that the fiery senior citizen is still releasing singles from an album that fell off the chart faster than Bionic. I just think she can do so much better. Excuse me while I go and watch "Love Profusion" on repeat.