When I open a digital promo and read the words "internet sensation", more often than not I just click delete. I have seen way too many deluded 10-year-olds belting out Lady Gaga covers on YouTube to bother with that shit. But there was something different about Cosmo Jarvis. First of all, he's fucking hot. Secondly, his latest single is called "Gay Pirates" and has been given Stephen Fry's seal of approval. So it must be good. And it is. "Gay Pirates" is a romantic sea shanty about gay love on a Pirate ship. Cosmo sings about his affection for Sebastian and the trials they must overcome to stay together. Depressingly, society hasn't changed all that much since the days of piracy and buried treasure - which is why I think the song strikes such a chord with listeners. You could change the setting to love between office workers in any small town in Australia and the story would play out much the same. Only without the gang rape and plank walking. I would hope. Given the song's lyrical content, I was surprised to learn that Cosmo is straight. I guess sometimes you need an outside observer to bring a fresh perspective to a very old story. Brace yourself for the quirkiest gay anthem of 2011.