Tuesday, April 06, 2010

Holestar, Kiely, Russella, Jer Ber & Karina

Tonight's post is dedicated to the underground icons of pop trash. These trannies, low rent hoes and motivational speakers devote their lives to pushing boundaries - fearlessly going where mainstream divas fear to tread. They sing about the important things in life (make-up, dancefloor politics, being fucked up the arse etc) and generally make the internet a more fabulous place with their ruthless publicity whoring and high budget video extravaganzas. I know some people roll their eyes at these hot bitches but I can't imagine tragic gay bars or YouTube without them. They are the true innovators of pop music and deserve to be honoured. Ladies, you have found a home on Pop Trash! There are literally hundred of divas I could have written about but here are five of the best - starting with London's hottest female tranny. A couple of weeks ago I featured Holestar's amazing debut single and the lavish video is finally here! Basically, Holestar gets on Chatroulette and scares a bunch of straight boys (see below). It's simple but incredibly effective. By the way, check out Worrapolova to snag a free remix and learn more about this rising superstar.

The next stunning anthem comes from a former Cheetah Girl. I had no idea who Kiely Williams was before a link to "Spectacular" appeared in my inbox but I know I'll never forget her. In one fell swoop, Kiely has kicked all the pretenders to the curb and reached icon status. I haven't heard this kind of unadulterated filth since Vanity revolutionised music as we know it in the 80s. "Spectacular" begins with the classy lyrics "last I remember I was face down, ass up, clothes off" and goes on to feature a lot of heavy groaning and classy ad-libs like "I hope he used a rubber" - all bow down to the new Queen of pop! The video is also a work of art. Kiely dances like a stripper in an outfit that Divine Brown would deem too tasteless. Some sleazy guy also gets his arse out for your viewing pleasure. Can someone please give Kiely the MTV Award for best video now? This is essential viewing for all trash fans!

After featuring two (semi-) natural women, it's time to give the trannies some loving. I wish I knew more about Russella because I'm completely obsessed with her genre defining debut single. I tried to do some digging but all I found was her Gardening blog! For the full Russella experience, watch her plant rhubarb in full drag here. As amazing as her gardening adventures are, the diva's music is even more gripping. "Too Fabulous" is pure class from the opening line "I'm just a long legged lady with a big set of balls" to the final tinny beat. I can honestly picture someone like Heidi Montag stealing this for her next iTunes smash. It's fierce, fresh and fabulous. And then there's the brilliant video. Russella is clearly a creative tour de force. I love the gay makeovers and classy costumes. Revel in her glamour below. Oh and make sure to watch the stunner's amazing Destiny's Child video.

My next honouree is the legendary Jer Ber Jones. I've been a Jer Ber fan since my friend Ro Ro introduced me to her special brand of musical magic back in 2007 and I'm glad to see that she's back with a new anthem. This time around the diva has joined forced with the equally stunning Calpernia Adams on "Transfixed". I genuinely love this song. The production is amazing and the ladies' eerie vocals give the song an edge. Speaking of eeriness, don't watch the video before bedtime or you'll have nightmares. And I'm not talking about their less is more approach to make-up! "Transfixed" is wonderfully weird and creepy. I love the disturbing special effects and dance moves. So much time, effort and creativity (not to mention, at least $20) went into this. If only Jer Ber's mainstream rivals could say the same. Check out this fabulous acid trip doubling as a video clip below.

Last but definitely not least is Philadelphia's favourite daughter. I've been meaning to write about Karina Bradley for months but The Prophet and D Listed got there first. The song slipped my mind until I rescued The Prophet from a Melrose Place marathon on Sunday night and we drove around for 4 hours listening to "Dance Floor Diva" on repeat. 'Cause that's how we roll! And while other gays have fallen for the stunning beauty's endless camp appeal, I honestly believe this is one of the best pop songs of 2010. "Dance Floor Diva" succeeds where recent efforts by Robyn, Britney and Christina have all failed - by perfectly combining heavenly vocals, insightful lyrics and revolutionary production. Karina simply does it better! The video is also a masterpiece. The poor bitch looks like a drag queen that's been locked in a sunbed for 48 hours before being forced to wear one of Jordan's old outfits. It's heaven! Oh and if you're wondering how she managed to fund such an iconic video - check out Karina's day job here. I would die to go to one of her workshops!

13 comments:

The Prophet said...

Karina is an icon!

Ro Ro said...

I was so happy to see this! I am truely amazed at Kiely's new found sluttiness. What a hoe! Jer is the fiercest trannimal ever! Basks in the glorly of this post and explores new talent that is sure to amaze and stun me as i listen. Great work mike!

Jafet M. Denegri said...

Are u sure that Karina Bradley it's not a tranny???
she really looks like a men!!!

Phil said...

Jer Ber! Loves her. And I'm anyone's for a cowbell.

Anonymous said...

Finally! Ive been waiting for karina to appear on this blog. She is the definition of pop trash!!

D'luv said...

That Kiely song is whoretastic, and I'm glad she finally sold enough ass for a video for it.

tommie said...

LOL - I just sent you the Kiely song! It's SPECTACULAR!

tommie said...

I'm just watching the Transfixed video - bloody hell, am I experiencing some sort of acid flashback?

Anonymous said...

HEY MANWHORE!!!!

WHAT DA FUCK HAPPENED TO THE POP PANEL?!?!?!

Brian Chang said...

I LOVE KIELY!!!!

Mike said...

Karina is definitely 100% woman!

And all hail Queen Kiely! I can't stop listening/watching "Spectacular". It's so amazing!

And Anon - funny that you mention it but Pop Panel is coming back very soon.

tommie said...

You skank! Did you exclude me after requests from my rabid stalker Mike?

Mike said...

LOL - I haven't finalised the participants! But it would help if you actually updated your blog more than twice a year...