Wednesday, October 07, 2009

Come Inside La Toya's Walls

I firmly believe "Sexual Feeling" is the litmus test that distinguishes true Toy Soldiers from casual fans. If La Toya's 1990 cult classic makes you want to give the nearest tranny a chest to chest or throws you into a big back door shaking frenzy - chances are you officially feel the joy of Toy! As far as I'm concerned the track ranks as one of the finest achievements of 20th century pop music. Everything about "Sexual Feeling" is utterly epic and jaw droppingly trashtastic. I don't even know where to start. After all, this is a song that tastefully combines minutes of erotic groaning, legendary lines like "get it wet" and "come inside my walls", La Toya rapping as well as Japanese and Italian lyrics! A lot of the credit has to go to Claudio and Franco Donato, who spent most of the 80s at the forefront of Italo-disco until working with Toy Toy killed their respective careers. The production is like a time capsule of late 80s influences. There are touches of house, spashes of Italo disco and a strong under current of hip hop. It shouldn't work - and many would argue that it doesn't - but I find the combination utterly irresistible.

"Sexual Feeling" is also poignant because it represents the moment that La Toya threw in the towel as far as trying to be a credible pop star and became the tragic puppet of her abusive and demented ex-husband Jack Gordon. I have no doubt Jack actually believed this deliciously dirty slice of pop porn would rocket La Toya to superstardom. And in his defence, if anyone else had recorded "Sexual Feeling" it probably would have been a #1 hit on shock value alone. Particularly when you consider the fact that the song pre-dates Madonna's hypersexual "Erotica" era and Janet's super sleazy self-titled 1993 album. Speaking of La Toya's boring sister, Janet clearly ripped of "Sexual Feeling" on her 1994 single "Throb" - proving once and for all that Toy not only got the looks but also the talent! As a special treat, I've included the song's eye popping fan made video. It's already been removed from youtube for being soft porn so get in quick. Believe me, you will need a tissue at the ready! However, please note that the video version is an edit. For the full "Sexual Feeling" experience check out the five and a half minute version. Mi piace!

EDIT: It was fun while it lasted but my lovely video was removed for violating Youtube regulations. I might post it on my Facebook instead!

31 comments:

Magical Froggy said...

The best post ever on this blog, surely it's all downhill from here?!

*gets it wet*

Adem With An E said...

ALL. KINDS. OF. INCREDIBLE.

Natty said...

that's just... jaw droppingly speechless. It's like watching home porn.

Bless Toy.

Tommy said...

EPIC FUCKING GENIUS, if you ask me.

don't touch, baby!

tidusin said...

I'm still searching for a nipple. Why she has two balloons?

Petro said...

God, she is so vile!

tommie said...

I just ejaculated!

Nasty G said...

OMG, brilliance! I just HAD to share it on Facebook too. ;)

undisco_me said...

It's a great slice of Italo-disco regardless of it being a Toy track. I genuinely like it's simplicity.

She looks like a really glamorous porn star - something Janet has never achieved.

Parker said...

Oh God.
Oh My God.

tommie said...

By the way - your beloved Shéna has managed to get C-listed on Radio 2 with Nasty Little Rumour! $ucce$$ for her at last!

The Prophet said...

This is one of my fave Toy songs. I'm a hardcore Janatic but the second I heard this I knew it was the original Throb!

Mi Piace! said...

This internet cafe just got ROCKED! I'm sure several other customers were experiencing their first Toygasms while webcaming their grannies...

Paul said...

Jesus Christ on a cross!

Jamie said...

This scarily turned me on. God bless you Latoya and all who sail in you!

John said...

Good gawd. There's a whole lotta sumfin up in here. Even in black and white, that performance still makes her look like she's wearing an adult diaper.

Jump! said...

Mike, after this post I have to say I seriously love you. I don't even think I care now if you ever do an in depth retrospective on Toya's brilliant Stock Aitken Waterman output.

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Jamie_movietrip said...
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Jamie_movietrip said...

Oh Mike, this is a triumph! Toy's sensusal Playboy masterpiece enhanced by her legendary Sexual Feeling in all it's glory! It doesn't get any better than this!

Chicago_Sexbox said...

Mi Piace just exploded from intense pleasure. Good thing I am using a friend's computer right now. LOL

Well done!

Anonymous said...

Sam fox started new relationships with Sabrina? But what about her Mirra???

Anonymous said...

Sam, what about Myrra Stratton?

TJ said...

Always been way up there as one of my fav Toy songs. the only way to accurately describe it is with two words: "Musical pornography"

I not only love the lyrics "Come Inside My Walls" - but i love the melody on which they are sung..

a true sentiment to Toys fabulous catalogue.