Monday, May 26, 2008

The Queen Of Hi-NRG & My Heart

Words can not describe the depth of my love for stunning Hi-NRG diva Kelly Wilde. How can one woman have so much style, beauty and blazing vocal talent? I'm truly ashamed to admit that I only discovered the delicious Ms Wilde recently. Since my beloved Kelly Llorenna fell off the face of the earth (probably due to acute fake tan poisoning), I have been searching for another holy icon to quench my thirst for trashy dance music. My quest was long and hard but eventually I stumbled across Kelly Wilde and it was love at first listen. Younger than Hazell Dean, more charismatic than Nicki French and sexier than Jo Frances - Kelly ticked all my boxes. If I were 30 years older and not into cock, this delicate flower would be the woman of my dreams!

My first introduction to the manifold delights of Kelly Wilde was her magnificent cover of Laura Branigan's "Gloria". I simply could not believe that such a major talent had managed to escape my attention. Kelly's take on "Gloria" is mesmerising and the video clip (below) has to be seen to be believed. I can't believe all the hateful comments that people are leaving on youtube. Do these fools have no ears? Bolstered by my discovery, I decided to delve deeper into the intoxicating world of Kelly Wilde and unearthed her failed attempt to qualify for Eurovision with the exquisite ballad "You Better Be Good To Me". The competition was obviously rigged because girlfriend blew the other bitches out of the water with her breathtaking vocals and sky high hair. The voters must have discovered that my future wife actually hails from Sydney instead of the arsehole of Europe (ie. the UK) - yes readers, Kelly Wilde is one of our own!

Never one to rest on her laurels, Kelly has recorded another two stunning dance cover versions for Energise records. This time around the Queen of Hi-NRG has deigned to interpret Blondie's "Maria" and Bonnie Tyler's "Holding Out For A Hero". You can listen to these awe inspiring anthems and order your very own copy here. I love them both but "Maria" is utter perfection. The B-side, "New Emotion", is also positively orgasmic. I highly recommend you add these classics to your collection! In the meantime, check out this amazing clip of my boo performing "Maria" at the 2008 Gran Canaria pride event. Be warned - this will leave you hypnotised like a death adder. Kelly's stunning microphone acrobatics are only surpassed by the hilarious gay dancers. Fingers crossed that Kelly is touring the UK when I visit in July. It would be an honour just to share the same air as this heavenly creature.


Ro Ro said...

This woman is fagulous! loving her drag hair! that vid was the gayest thing i've seen in awhile. Thank u for bringing another great artist to my attention. Also i think she looks like a glamorous version of bonnie tyler lol.

Jay said...

If I had been able to take my usual holiday, I would have witnessed that stunning performance!I am so suing...

Mike said...

Hey Ro Ro, I knew you'd fall for Kelly. I find her style and glamour almost overpowering. Kylie should hire her stylist!

Jay - You really should sue. How brilliant is Kelly's performance? My favourite bit is when the camera pans into the crowd and you see all the geriatric gays in a frenzy! LOL

Anonymous said...

Kelly performed live at our local gay pub for Halloween last year and I can officially say no one was really interested, there was one lone gay who danced the whole night long to her - and it wasn't me!

I did like her performance of 'Maria' though, she really belted it out well on that cover, there are some pics from the night on my facebook if any of you whores are interested, I'll post a link ;)

heavy crisco xx

Jamie_movietrip said...

She was at Birmingham Pride yesterday, I didn't go - it rained. But I do own the fabulous Holding Out For A Hero/Maria double-a-side limited edition CD-R, and I can confirm it's a musical tour de force to be reckoned with. My only complaint is that Kelly isn't on the cover art herself. She's signed to Energise Records, the original home of Nicki French, before she made it big!

Adem With An E said...


That second picture; to-die-for hair.

Jamie said...

Nooooo!!! I missed Kelly at Birmingham Pride.

I have witnessed the sheer camp drama and tragedy that is Kelly 'live' on two occasions. The second time she was playing a rough old pub in Brum to a disinterested audience with the exception of myself and the drag queen compare who seemed the only ones to be in awe of her utter brilliance.

She later made the sweeping claim that she could sing 'Gloria' in any language. When I asked for an impromptu swedish rendition she said she didnt know that one and warbled along in chinese or something instead. Totally fabulous! I grabbed her arm at the end of the performance to tell her how fabulous she was, half hoping some of her tragic genius would rub off on me.

Poster Girl said...

A hi-NRG "Holding Out For A Hero" is exactly what my life needed. You always find the best pictures too.

Miss Halliwell said...

As a long term Kelly Wilde fan, i am the proud owner of the original Bubblebass VS Kelly version of Gloria...You would ejaculate at the vocal prowess on that CD!

I saw Kelly live in Bennets many moons ago when she did a 'triple' bill (or is that Terrible...) with Nicki French & Hazell Dean...Or Kelly Marie or something. It was wilde...LOL

Bless you Mike for unleashing another Hi NRG Box on the world of poofs!

Miss H

(Her cover of Mary Kiani's New Emulsion is exquisite!)

Anonymous said...

I think this photo I took of Kelly at the Star And Garter @ halloween says it all really:

sexy lady - enough to turn you into a pussy plower Mike?!

heavy crisco xx

D'luv said...

Wow! This guy is almost passable!

Craig said...

Wow - talk about blast from the past!! Went to see her many moons ago when she was promoting 'Gloria'. Got chatting to her and told her I loved YBBGTM and she shoulda won...
She then went on to ask me to shout for it when she asked the crowd if they wanted anything special - haha!!!
And for the encore of Gloria, my friend and I were invited on stage with her as her backing dancers - fab ;)
She was very funny and cool when we chatted, so good to see her mentioned :)