Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Chloe Lattanzi Rocks The Cradle

I'm a huge fan of Olivia Newton-John's slightly demented daughter. I can't get enough of Chloe Lattanzi's crazy antics in the tabloids and I ache for the bizarre video blogs that occasionally pop up on her Myspace. Most of all, I love her music. Chloe's catchy anorexia anthem "Delicious" came in at number 11 on my best of 2007 countdown and it probably should have placed even higher, given that it's still burning up my Ipod all these months later. Chloe has been threatening to release her debut album for almost 5 years but the wait could finally be over thanks to an American talent show.

MTV's Rock The Cradle is kind of like American Idol for celebrity offspring. Basically, Chloe is battling the likes of MC Hammer's daughter and Bobby Brown's son for a recording contract. I wish the show was broadcast in Australia - this trash has my name written all over it! Unfortunately, Chloe's first performance was panned by all the judges except the lovely Belinda Carlisle and she placed second last in the phone poll. I was interested to see the clip for myself and I'm completely mystified by the negative reaction. Chloe's interpretation of the INXS classic "Never Tear Us Apart" is spectacular. I love her scary man voice, crazy eyes and theatrical phrasing. Sure, she's a little rough around the edges but there's no denying that Chloe has something very unique about her. Check out her stunning performance for yourself:

Never Tear Us Apart

After narrowly avoiding elimination, Chloe switched into rock chick mode for the "parent's choice" show in round two. I think Olivia must be really sick of sitting in the audience because she selected a complete stinker in an obvious attempt to get Chloe booted. The judges were relatively impressed but I agree with Belinda's comment that it was a poor song choice. The performance itself, however, is fucking fabulous and typically demented. I thought Chloe was going to burst an implant when she started writhing on the floor like Linda Blair in The Exorcist! I really hope she makes it through to the next round - I'm dying to see what this crazy broad comes up with next. Watch Chloe throw it down:

I Hate Everything About You

I'm not sure of the show's format but I hope the contestants are eventually allowed to perform original material. Chloe is yet to post a song on a her myspace that hasn't completely blown me away. I love her dark electro sound and the depressing yet strangely catchy lyrics. I didn't think Chloe would ever surpass the brilliance of "Delicious" but her latest offering does just that. "Make It Stop" is one of the best songs I've heard all year. The crashing synths and driving beats provide an epic backdrop for Chloe's pleading voice and bittersweet lyrics. Think of this exquisite anthem as the bleak and bitter sister of Robyn's "Be Mine". Chloe had better win Rock The Cradle so I can finally get my hands on her fucking album!

A low quality unmixed demo of "Make It Stop" was made available on Chloe's Myspace and I don't think anyone from her camp would mind me posting it. The sound is a bit rough but it gives you a good idea of the track's unlimited potential.


Magical Froggy said...

What has she done to herself??! She looks like Pete Burns!

Arlen said...

Wow! What an intriguing character! After watching/listening to those clips I am very ineterested in her :)
Her INXS performance was very good, I don't understand the mostly negative reactions from the judges. However, while the Three Days Grace song (which I love) was well performed, the vocal was pretty piss poor!
Downloaded 'Delicious' though and I really like it :)
Hopefully she does well in the competition!

Mike said...

Are you questioning Chloe's natural beauty?! I think she looks kooky but strangely appealing in a 'blow up doll gone wrong' kind of way. I love her gigantic lips!

Glad you like "Delicious", Arlen! It's superb - as is everything I've heard from Chloe. I really hope things take off for her because she already has an album's worth of great material!

john said...

Hey mike u wouldn't happen to have chloe's Sad city and Magic mp3's
that u could post i had them way back
but my fucking computer crashed and i lost them and she has not posted them again since i have a feeling u got em. SO please share as much of this Hot mess as you can. I love her

D'luv said...

Jesus -- Chloe looks like she could teach even me a thing or two about sucking cock.

tommie said...

Chloe looks really weird, it has to be said! It looks like she's had a collagen injection, chin implants AND a brow lift, and she's not even 25 yet, is she?

I love Delicious though. It's so wrong it's right.

cradlewillrock said...

Besides her look, what do you think about her vocal abilities, does she have what it takes?

Are They Born To Rock?
When Rockstars Raise You, Judges
Are The Least Of Your Concerns.
Rock The Cradle
10pm ET/PT MTV

Ro Ro said...

When did Amanda LePore go brunette? I knew she was gonna try her hand at singing but i prefer her as a blonde!

Adem With An E said...

What happened to her "Magic" sampling song on MySpace? I never got around to ripping that and I absolutely LOVE it. Do you still have it lying around somewhere or lovely Mike??

Mike said...

H8trs! Chloe has always looked kind of freaky - I don't think she's had that much done apart from those insane lips and her Victoria Beckham inspired fake tits.

To answer RockTheCradle's question - I think Chloe has an amazingly unique voice and I would vote for her if I lived in the US.

John & Adem, I do have the rips but I'm not sure if I can post them here particularly when "Magic" is supposed to be her first Aus single. Send me an e-mail and I'll hook you up.

RoRo - I haven't forgotten Brigitte!

Helen said...

Please send me delicious and sad city if you can...i've been seraching for them for months, even asked Chloe herself to no avail...I've supplied my email.