Friday, April 18, 2008

All I See - The Video

Forget Citizen Kane, Kylie's zero budget "All I See" film clip sets a new benchmark for cinematic excellence! Before I get too carried away, I should put the video in context. It's cheap. Let's get that out of the way first. I'm convinced Dannii threw this fabulous crap together on her laptop after finishing off her last Great Wall diary entry! It's also not an official clip but a "promo video". Splitting hairs, I know, but there is a small difference (basically, the video was concocted to promote "All I See" online). Lastly, it wasn't paid for by Kylie's record company - the copyright belongs to Darenote, the holding company managed by Kylie's dad. In other words, this is Kylie's lowest budget offering since the amazing "Your Disco Needs You" and in my opinion, is all the better for it. "All I See" is a trash lover's wet dream!

I really don't know where to start because I adore every second of this tat. I guess the costumes are as good a place as any. I love the fact that Kylie couldn't be fucked buying something new but simply dusts off her Dancing With The Stars outfits. That Village People inspired leather queen look is just too fabulous. Freddie Mercury is looking down from heaven and he has a boner! The sparkling mini-dress is gorgeous and I laughed out loud when the camera pans down to Kylie's hooker stilettos as she sings "had to make sure I'm lookin' hot". Then there's the very welcome presence of Kylie's insanely hot dancer Marco Da Silva, who mercifully spends the entire clip shirtless. Marco must have a pretty good sense of humour because I haven't seen dance moves like that since the glory days of C&C Music Factory!

The black and white photography is lovely and I approve of the multiple Kylies (obviously a homage to the previously mentioned "Your Disco Needs You" video clip) but the undisputed highlight for me is the star sequence. I've watched it about 30 times and I still can't stop laughing. Poor Kylie looks like she's hiding behind a curtain in an evil drag queen's lair! This is my favourite moment in a Kylie video since her slow motion slide down a fireman's pole in "Please Stay". "All I See" is still scheduled as an American only single but I'd love for it to be released worldwide, if only to spite Kylie's increasingly humourless fanbase. Enjoy!

15 comments:

Johnny D said...

William Baker must be laughing like a hyaena about the way things are turning out!

Still can't wait for the X Tour to hit....

Peibols said...

I just can not believe it.

I think she just can't get any lower.

The "it's a promo" excuse sucks.

Low cost.

Jay said...

Fabulous video!

I knew you'd love it the second I saw it!

bubu said...

dannii's long-term strategy is finally working.
i can't see the difference now, and I'm not sure which Minogue this video belongs to...

mel mel said...

I loved the starry curtain bit too! I don't know how many times I've said it today, but it is exactly like a silent era Hollywood fantasy scene - bliss!

tommie said...

That is insanely crap, it's almost brilliant.

Even Dannii's Perfection had a bigger budget than this shit!

Mike said...

I love this craptastic masterpiece more each time I see it. I've watched "All I See" more in one day that I've watched IMA & "Wow" in 3 months! I think this is my favourite Kylie video since "Slow"...it's just so funny, I can't stop laughing!

Seriously though, what was everyone expecting? It's a video for an American only single that has already flopped. Why would she spend a fortune of her own money on it? I think it's really cool that she bothered making one at all and I love the result. I haven't been this amused by Kylie in years!

bubu said...

well, when Kylie decide to shoot this marvellous thing, 'X' probably wasn't out in the US nor she didn't "All I See" was going to be a Fan Release. the budget was going to be the same anyway, wasn't it?

by they way, it is confirmed now that 'X' has been a ONE WEEK LIMITED EDITION FAN RELEASE! this week's numbers:

4 6 MINOGUE*KYLIE X 5,588 3,277 -41.4% 15,009

she dropped from the Billboard 200 by 53 copies (that is, #200 sold 3,330 this week). the number come from the Billboard Electronic Albums Chart, where she is still #6. Kylie is the queen of the low cost electronic music!

Justin said...

Kylie just posted on .com that this was something just for the fans. She shot it in 3 hours after a day of rehearsals. She also said when in doubt always add more glitter! LOL!

So the video is good for what it is.

I do love the fierce Jean Paul Gaultier bondage outfit and the mini dress is so 90s slut chic. Love my homegurl!

Ro Ro said...

I loved the video as well! Thanks for letting me know about it. Brigitte too!!!!

Mike said...

Kylie is such a thieving bitch - How dare she steal Dannii's amazing marketing technique of having "fan releases"!!! LOL at the 3 hour shoot - you can tell! Bless her for the info and for bothering when her shit record label couldn't be bothered. She should make all her clips in 3 hours. This shit is genius!

Thanks for updating us on Kylie's stunning US sales, Bubu! And RoRo, glad you liked Brigitte. I'm having e-mail troubles so I'm glad they got through xx

Johnny D said...

Absolutely fabulous!

I wasn't expecting the words "fan release" and "Minogue" to be in the same sentence until Dannii's Club Dildo is released early next month!

Natty said...

I do think Kylie looks fantastic though, despite the crapness. I would've loved some of the scenes from the video to have been intercut with scenes of Kylie checking out Marco busting a few dancemoves in some club. At least then I don't think it'd have seemed so lame.

BruDé said...

I love every second of this video !!!!!!! The guy is hot !

Acer (Alex) Always said...

I like the promo as it is simple but just a good bit of fun. It is sad that X bombed here. I have yet to pick up my copy due to some ... money issues but I plan on getting it ASAP.